20 Questions?????

Ask any long distance bike tourer who has been at it for a while what’s the toughest part of the journey and there’s invariably one response: caravan drivers.

Not so much their driving which is bad enough but the repetitive questions now been asked hundreds of times.

Some have different names but let’s call it 20 Questions.


20 Questions is the remorseless interrogation by the ageing Grey Nomads heading north for their annual drenching in winter sun.

No introductions, no politeness, just total intrusion.

“It certainly turns me off rapido. You just settle down in a comfortable location after riding, say, 112km in almost 7 hours and someone appears at your shoulder to start playing. It’s not as if they even listen to the answers.”

“They then wander off to be replaced by someone else with the same questions in the same order.”

“I spent most of today as I pedalled up the sealed road thinking of printing up a T shirt with the answers to the 8 questions I am most commonly asked each day. You will probably understand that by now the means of my transportation is one of the less interesting conversations.”

“Anyway, here are the 8 answers: Melbourne, Darwin, 4 months, 6 months or sooner if I get sick of it, depends on the state of the road, six hours is a good day at the office, I’m not allowed to talk about how many punctures I get, because I have a small penis.”